Car Buying BedPost, aka I Should Have Stayed in Bed

There are many things in life that must be done that are not my favorite activities. Doing dishes might be at the top of the list. Struggling through pushups for my Army Physical Training Test, paying bills, typing up doctor notes, and switching the used-up roll of toilet paper for a new one round out my top five of Unfavorite Activities Done on a Regular Basis.

Last week, Mike and I had to do one of the things I despise most – buy a car. The last time I did this was in 2005 and I still haven't recovered from it. On the plus side, I now have Mike to run interference, which is nice. Also, the internet has made car buying so much easier than it used to be. Instead of going to lot after lot and driving car after car, we were able to do the bulk of our research online and narrow it down to the one car we wanted: the 2011 Honda CR-V. All we needed to do was test drive it...and that's where the pain, anguish, and agony came in. Because even though the internet has made car buying somewhat more palatable, it hasn't eliminated The Car Salesman; and until that happens the experience will always be torturous.

We essentially had our car picked out and we planned on paying for it in cash, so shouldn't that mean that we could get in and out somewhat quickly and (relatively) unscathed? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! No.

I hate, hate, hate that we are expected to barter for the ultimate price of the vehicle. I never to go Best Buy and offer to give them $1000 for a $1200 TV. I never haggle over the cost of eggs and apples at the grocery store as I'm standing in the check out line. Why do we have to do this with cars? Why can't the price just be the price?

My other beef: Although the dealer may take off some of the price, then they add "drive out of the lot fees" and paperwork fees and "we loaded some extras that aren't included in the sticker price but now they're part of the car so you have to pay them" costs. And then they act oh-so-annoyed when you ask why there's that particular fee to pay and why it wasn't included in the first place. They don't add extra buttons and doo-hickeys that I have to pay for to the TV at Best Buy. My eggs don't have hidden "chicken/egg separation" fees and I don't have to pay extra on my apples to say that I have the right to take them out of the store.

In the end, we spent almost a whole day playing The Car Buying Game, which the buyer never wins. I felt like the dealer fed us more than a few lines, the finance guy was a total jerk, and as we neared our sixth hour there and I was tired and lightheaded and nauseated, I realized I would have paid them twice as much as the car was worth just so that someone could land on the Game Over space. Yes, The Car Salesman won; and, here's a hint, the dealers always win because they're not afraid to play dirty.

To end on a positive note, we got a car that we love. It's fun to drive, a smooth ride, has a great sound system, and (the part that sold me on the CR-V), the safety specs are excellent. This is our family car, the first car Mike and I bought together. We purchased it with our future kids in mind and we can't wait to fill it with little voices asking if we're there yet and informing us that their sibling is touching them.

Here are our Halloween pumpkins. Mike's is on the top, mine on the bottom.

As expected, our home was inundated with hoards of little trick or treaters. We had bought five bags of candy and thought we'd be fine, but ran out around 7:15. We started off letting kids pick out their own candy, but quickly shifted tactics when two girls who were old enough to know better picked a huge handful rather than just one. As our stockpile started dwindling, we entered panic mode and started rummaging through the house looking for forgotten candy. We found some Kit Kats and Nestle Crunch left over from Easter, a few bags of cookies in the pantry, some coconut M&Ms that we didn't get around to eating yet, and packages of gum. Hooray! Back in business! We just barely made it to the last trick or treater without running out.

Our candy predicament aside, we had a great evening. Our meal turned out well (to be blogged about later). We enjoyed our last night of "13 Nights of Halloween" watching "Nightmare Before Christmas." And we filed away several lessons learned:

1- Buy one more bag than you think you'll need.

2- Hand out treats to the kids rather than letting them pick. This lesson is based not only on the greedy girls but also on numerous indecisive five-year-olds.

3- Use apple cinnamon scented candles in your pumpkins and it makes the porch smell really nice.

4- Throw pumpkins away first thing the next morning, as pumpkin fuzziness, mushiness, and bug infestation are directly proportional to time elapsed since carving. Other option is to carve closer to Halloween.

5- Use gloves and/or a shovel to throw away pumpkins.

6- Don't store refrigerated roll dough in the pantry.